Of Birthdays and Blessings

Yesterday was my birthday, and it's always a bittersweet day for me for some reason. I'd love to live in the denial that I'm aging and that change is happening around me. As I preached Sunday, I was mindful that someone in the congregation had their birthday on Saturday and, though close in age to me, his lifespan will almost certainly be much shorter due to genetics. Had he been there we would definitely have made a fuss of him during the service.

Although it was a Civic Holiday yesterday, I still ended up working and, after being spoiled with dinner out and enjoying cake with family, I finally got home to check facebook and found many messages and best wishes. I loved each one, and the cards I found under my apartment door from people in the building. Some were more poignant for me than others, but all reminded me of the many connections I'm blessed to have, and the friends and community which surround me. It makes me very mindful of those who struggle to find community and their place within it.

Mixed in with the hopes for a great day were comments encouraging me to reflect on the year that has passed and to offer thanks, and offering prayer for the year of ministry ahead. What a gift to simply be reminded to turn the focus back, even for a few moments, to where it ought to be. Because even as birthdays are meant to celebrate the person's continued presence and the joy they bring on the anniversary of their entrance into the world, we really should be saying thanks to God for crafting and creating each unique life, for the purpose each has been given, and for the ways we are blessed by God through them. 

Perhaps this is part of the reason I'm a bit uncomfortable with birthdays. I'm just the same me all the time, sometimes better at letting God hold the reins than others. Even though I'm a Leo, I still don't want to be made into something greater than I am. But thanking God for blessing me, for allowing me to be a blessing, for shaping and growing me and giving me grace and gifts to share - that's something I can more easily get on board with and celebrate.

All of this makes me think about how we celebrate birthdays in church and, particularly, with our kids. What are we really doing and saying when we celebrate birthdays? Are we saying someone is great for still being around another year? Or do we take this chance to lessen the focus on shiny presents and cake and instead talk about the ways we have seen this person grow and develop in faith and character since last year, the ways their service or attitude or choices have helped others, or the ways they have shown strength and courage, modeling trusting in God? Do we offer thanks to God for guiding and protecting and journeying with them? Now that would be a real birthday celebration.

As you think about ramping up for fall, now is the time to consider any changes you might want to make, no matter how small, in how you handle birthdays. What do you want them to say about God's role in participants' lives? What do you want them to say about hope and resilience and faith? If many of your kids are rarely in attendance, it can be a bit of a challenge and you don't want to create competition or uncomfortably center anyone out. How can you offer the words you feel God wanting you to share, regardless of the situation of each child? Will it be through a personal card that others can add to, circling the birthday child and saying a prayer of thanks or sharing what gifts this child brings? Will it be through a special chat, even if just for a few minutes, where the child gets to share what they are excited about that happened in the past year, where they saw or felt God and what they hope for the coming year? 

I encourage you to throw this into the mix of preparation to set your tone for the new season's activities. Talk with your leaders and get their perspective, and perhaps parents as well. How can the celebration be a reflection on the past year and seeking God's blessing into the future? How best can you celebrate what God is doing in each child and youth at their year's milestone? 

Happy birthday everyone, whenever it comes, and may God continue to bless and grow and challenge you into all that you were made to be.